in my movement reclamation era…
A friend mentioned this idea of reclaiming movement. She spoke to how she’s found a freedom and joy in movement again, after years of denying herself the joy.
We talked about how women are often positioned to work out because we want to be thin. And it becomes another chore, something that is expected of us. Another thing to add to our laundry list of impossible stereotypes to fit an image of what we should be.
And she said how special the haus is because it’s the first place she’s felt safe to find her own reasons to move. That’s when she said she’s in her ‘ reclaiming movement era ‘
While we have many missions at the haus- I realized she hit on one. This idea of reclaiming movement. Of reclaiming space.
If we are all honest with ourselves - there was a moment along our life journey where we fully recognize what our role is supposed to be in this system (yes I’m referring to the patriarchy). For me I was in third grade. And I was bullied a lot. I had a desk mate named Chris. He used to bully me while we were supposed to be doing work. He would hit my arm, try to stab me with pencils and even move the paper I was writing on away from me. I talked to my mom. And she told me to stand up to bullies. And I told my teacher. In the middle of class, she asked me to get up, pick up my desk and move it across the room. Then she looked me dead in the eye and said condescendingly: is that better Jessica?
That was the moment I learned shame. And that was when I learned how much space I was allowed to take up.
For some of us it’s third grade, others it’s college or in their professional career - but we’ve all felt that moment when we are put in our place by someone who assumes they know our place.
After that day in class.. I recognized every time I asked for too much. Every time I was too loud. And every time I was the problem.
I was lucky to find dance in high school, because that was when I first reclaimed movement. I recognize now that movement allowed me to be as loud and dramatic as I wanted. I got to say the things in dance I felt. I got to say the things I couldn’t say in other spaces. And it empowered me.
After years of working in a bunch of places— I’ve had MANY. jobs. I had a gut feeling, that i was not the only one who had more to say and more to feel and more to be .. and I couldn’t be the only one missing a place to feel safe to explore this notion. Without knowing how it might pan out, this space and idea deserved a chance.
Five years later and the haustlers i see and the stories I share .. I celebrate that together we’ve made this space a reality. The haus is successful because each person that shows up allows themselves the space to be authentically them.
Haustlers allow themselves to take space, allow themselves to get strong and allow themselves to be confident. We allow ourselves to be loud!! I allow myself to be too much!
It’s been so motivating and inspiring to facilitate a space that we feel safe to take time for ourselves in. That we feel safe exist for exactly who we are.
I look forward to continuing this mission of reclaiming movement and I hope we can inspire many more women to join us.